Child custody attorneys lawyers Concord, NC

Child custody is surely the most stressfull and often heartbreaking issue in domestic law. Frequently, people will go to great degrees to obtain custody, some fair and some unfair. Unfortunately, children are often caught in the middle.

In North Carolina, an initial custody determination between two parents is based solely on the best interests of the child. This is a standard that parents involved in a custody dispute should use as well when conducting themselves outside of the court room. Courts do not like parents constantly bickering over custody, especially in the presence of the children, and they will quickly put an end to any name-calling that they believe adversely affects minor children.

There is no formula for determining custody other than the best interests test mentioned above. However, in order to improve your chances of obtaining custody it is very important that you do not place your children in the middle of conflict with your spouse. You should not refer to your spouse in a bad manner in front of your kids. You should not prevent your spouse from seeing your kids if they currently reside with you unless your spouse poses a real danger to your kids, or a court has issued an order preventing your spouse from seeing your kids. You should not engage in drug use or excessive alcohol consumption while your kids are with you. You should never have boyfriends or girlfriends or any other person with you whom you have intimate relations with but are not married to, spend the evening overnight with you while your kids are present. And of course, acts of domestic violence can not only land you in jail, they can severely hurt your chances of getting custody.

You may disagree with these suggestions, but if your goal is to improve your chances of custody, you should follow them.

You should also make sure that your children are well taken care of, properly supervised, and provided for while in your care. While doing all of these things is no guarantee that you will get custody, they will go a long way towards impressing the court that it is in the child's best interest that they reside with you.

What if you have custody or visitation, and want to change it? - In order to modify an existing custody order, you must show the court that a substantial change of circumstances has occurred since the last custody order was entered that affects the welfare of the child. This can be a positive change or a negative change.

For example, if the parent with custody becomes abusive physically or mentally to the child, or engages in acts of domestic violence, or moves in with an abusive or substance abusing step-parent, boyfriend or girlfriend, this would be a change in circumstances that might very well affect the welfare of your children. If your children aren't being properly cared for while in the custody of the other party, this might be a change. If the other party is moving out of the area, this might be a change if most of the ties your children have are local.

If you lost custody initially because you had problems such as substance abuse or lack of adequate housing, but you now have corrected those problems, that might also be a change that could justify the court in modifying the existing order. There are any number of things that can happen following a custody order that might support a change, and each case is different.

Finally, it is important to remember that once a court has entered a custody order, only a court has the authority to modify it. So even if you and your spouse agree to change the custody order that is in place, any change you make will not be enforceable until a judge has signed an order modifying the original custody or visitation order to reflect the changes you and the child's other parent have agreed to. Also, a judge does not have to go along with the modification even if you and your spouse are in agreement. Although this rarely happens, a judge may refuse to sign a modified order if they believe that the modification is not in the child's best interest.